The Real Life

After getting married, then preparing for another wedding, getting married AGAIN and a longish vacation we finally settled down. We choose to rent a condominium in Cainta. We choose this as our first home because it is near our church, it's furnished and it is relatively nice residential complex near commercial areas. Now the real life of married couple begins...

Our first few days was really not normal, we were still not recovered from our vacation mode so we still wake up at 9 am, have breakfast at 10 am, lunch at 3pm and a very late dinner. This mode lasted, well until now... Josh is working from home so he doesn't have to rush to wake up and get ready and drive to work. He just simply gets up, take a few steps to get a shower then another 4 steps to go to work. Speaking of work he did go back to work the day after we arrived from Bangkok.

I know how josh can be obsessive with things, especially with work and books (he has warned me about it before and i heard a couple of warning from his friends as well) so i have my heart prepared for that, but being with him in actuality makes the all difference, i underestimated his obsessiveness, my expectation failed me... Josh, the minute he gets his hand on his computer will work restlessly like the energizer bunny... he can stare in his computer without looking away for hours, he is perfectly fine watching tv shows in his ipod for hours while working, he watches tv shows intensely without moving, so still that i can sketch his profile and he can read books while doing other stuff or in very extreme conditions (e.g. while a boat is being shaken forcefully by waves). These are some examples of how josh can be obsessive. It was hard at first to adjust to this obsessiveness because I on the other hand am Josh's exact opposite... i have a hard time paying attention to a certain thing for a long time. I get bored easily, so i find myself doing other things to amuse myself (e.g. drawing while listening to a lecture at class, or just simply fidget ing with things). My friends even jokes that i have ADHD, but that's just a joke there's nothing to be alarmed about.

We are in the real life now, beyond the long distance relationship and holidays. We get to live with the flaws and imperfections of each other. While talking before we have our expectations set that living together will not be all fun, we know that in our case there will be major adjustments and conflicts will arise. And being two different people living together certainly creates friction. We know it is foolish and selfish to expect someone to change just to conform to ones temperament. Knowing our differences makes us learn how we can balance each other... So i provide josh good distraction and he helps me to have structure and help me endure boredom. We learn that we can easily hurt each other if we will be just focus on our own temperament so we can learn how to serve each other well.